MEMBER ARTICLE: "Spirituality" and kinky sexuality

MEMBER ARTICLE: "Spirituality" and kinky sexuality

from Recon News

22 December 2019

By YorksDomAndHusbr4Son

I have long experienced some kind of connection between what I mean by as spirituality (by which I do not mean religion!) and aspects of my sexuality. I am now in my 60s but as long ago as in my 20s I remember instances both of having wonderful sexual experience which left me with feelings of being completely at peace, in harmony with the universe. Conversely, I also recall occasions of feeling of such peace and harmony in non-sexual situations which, in turn, stimulated feelings of heightened sexual desire. It was almost that is sex was at one end of a rope and spirituality at the other, yet they were definitely on the same rope!

Much religious imagery in Hinduism, and in belief systems that were later replaced by monotheistic religions, doesn't make much distinction between sex and the divine. It took me a while to get past my fundamentalist Christian suppression of my sexuality based on belief that sex and spirituality are somehow entirely separate things which are often in conflict.

I suspect that both religion and sex are at least to some extent about power. Once I managed to ditch my fundamentalist religious beliefs, I started to see the validity of a feminist view of religion. Power has been abused throughout human history. Some religions seem to have been formulated by men to create an image of god, deity, as a sort of massive sky-ward projection of themselves, which then legitimises the power men have over women and their other 'possessions'. By now I believed in equality of all people, regardless of gender. I remember protesting at an early GayFest, at a meeting to introduce delegates to BDSM, objecting to 'this regressive emulation of the worst excesses of patriarchal abuses'...

Regardless of my intellectual objections, that night I went home and discovered to my horror that I was actually hugely turned on by thoughts of using power over another in the context of sex. It took me a while to realise that there was a big difference between what consensual BDSM meant as distinct from abuse. As a result of that realisation, I began to have some sexual encounters involving various elements of 'worship' of me - as a man (to repeat: I believe man invented the whole idea of worship and god, fantasizing projections of themselves onto the sky).

And now for me, someone kneeling, serving, submitting, obeying and taking risks to opening up to me - both physically, mentally and emotionally -, once trust has been built, amounts to sex on a completely different level: "turbo-charged" does not do it justice. It can involve abandonment of someone's self to my Will, the Dominant/Master/Man-god who will always use but never abuse the power and consent that a sub/slave hands over to me.

I see this kind of thing as just a more honest type of religion - a human religion that involves worship, of some by others. But in order for that to happen in its full potential requires trust, respect, guts and maybe even love.

If you'd like to share your thoughts on fetish and kink, send your ideas or a copy of a first draft to: social@recon.com

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